I Could Have Saved You
by Conspiraty
Summary: I could have done something...but instead I let you suffer. Why didn't I do anything...why didn't I save you? I do not own Miraculous Ladybug or the image.
1. Chapter 1

_Penguin: Hullo! It's been a while since I posted a new one-shot xD So here you go! WARNING: Be prepared to cry…because there's gonna be so sad moments in this o3o_

 _Onward! (A/N: All of the text will be in italics because it's a letter.)_

* * *

 _Hi…_

 _I know that you probably won't be able to read this…but I need to write this down…to stop feeling guilty…to stop feeling pain…_

 _To get over you. I didn't mean to hurt you…I never did…But I did it anyway…But I didn't know…you were suffering._

 _I didn't know that you standing there was your cry for help. Every day…I'd see you standing there…every time I got home from school…_

 _I didn't know why you were there…but you just stared at me, directly at me…and I didn't know why…_

 _I thought it was because you were shy…but it was so much more…_

 _Every day after school…you'd be there, but you wouldn't say anything. You'd just stand there, with ripped clothes and messy hair. And I thought you were just standing there waiting for me…_

 _But you needed help and I didn't notice. One day…I came home from school…_

 _And you weren't there._

 _I looked for you…day and night…and I found out that you…killed yourself…_

 _I felt guilty…because I didn't save you…and I didn't notice your cry for help…I didn't do anything…_

 _Why didn't I do anything for you?_ _I could have done something…but now, you're lost forever…_

 _Your parents are still devastated…Alya's distant…nothing's the same without you here…I could have loved you, protected you…I still wish I could…_

 _Your beautiful eyes, your beautiful hair…your kindness…_

 _God, I'm an idiot for not noticing you needed someone to help you._ _Is this…how it was meant to be? For you to suffer… and for me to regret not coming to you sooner?_

 _Was this how life wanted it? I know I shouldn't be blaming myself…but every night…I think about you…and you still standing outside my house…crying for help…_

 _I'll never know…what it's like to hold you…kiss you…hug you…cuddle you…_

 _I should have talked to you…instead of just watching you…_

 _Marinette…_

 _Please come back to me…_

 _Please…_

 _Come back._ _Nothing fits with you. Nothing works without you… Nothing is the same…_

 _Life is blank and meaningless…_

 _I hope you know…_

 _That I loved you. I really did. I didn't mean to break you…I didn't mean any of it…_

 _Please…be happy up there for me…and know…_

 _I'll always love you…no matter what…_

 _Love,_

 _Adrien Agreste_

* * *

 _Penguin: I'm sorry…~sniffles~ Bye…_


	2. Chapter 2

_Hi Marinette…_

 _It's me again. How are you doing up there? Are you happy? Do you…miss us?_

 _Do you even watch us from there? Knowing that we'll grow up and get married and have kids while you…stay the same age for the rest of your life? Does it hurt? Knowing that you can never come back?_

 _Your funeral was today. I went but… I couldn't look at your dead body. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't find the courage to look at the beautiful soul I destroyed… Knowing that I'm the reason that you died… I don't have the right to look at your dead body. I walked outside past the church to the bench…and I cried. It felt like hours, even though it was only minutes… Even Chloe was there… She didn't cry…but it looked like she was going to._

 _Why was I even allowed to go to your funeral? Your parents invited me to go, but they don't even know that I'm the reason that you're gone. They don't know that their daughter was taken away from the cat themed superhero of Paris._

 _I haven't even turned into Chat Noir since you left… how would I be able to fight akumas knowing that I won't see you coming? Fighting without you isn't the same anymore…_

 _Master Fu decided to give someone else your earrings… but I don't want to fight crime with anyone but you…_

 _Tell me how to move on, Marinette. I don't know what to do anymore. How can I forget that fatal night? How can I forget when I'm the one who caused it? I can still see you pulling the trigger…me telling you to not do it. The hot tears that went down your eyes as you whispered goodbye… The blood that pooled out of your head as I cradled your dead body._

 _Do you remember that night? The night you told me that you couldn't do it anymore? The night that you didn't know would change all of us?_

 _I miss your smile. The one that would make me smile every time I was feeling down? Do you still smile that same smile? Once I go to heaven…will you save that smile for me? I want to see it again…_

 _Can you make me a promise up there Marinette? Would you…_

 _Would you welcome me with open arms? Or look at me as the broken man I am now? Do you think differently of me because I couldn't help you? Do you see me as the helpless pathetic loser who couldn't even tell that his best friend was depressed?_

 _I didn't know…I didn't know how you felt. And because of that, it destroyed you. It tore you up inside until…until you decided to take your own life. I wish I saw the signs…_

 _Marinette…I'm so sorry. I wish I could bring you back. I have one more question for you…_

 _If I had saved you, would you still be here today? Once I get up there…_

 _I'll ask you._

 _Love,_

 _Adrien Agreste_

* * *

 _Penguin: I hope you enjoyed the second part. I'm not sure if I'll do a third part yet, so please don't ask. Bai!_


End file.
